The Power of Community: Why Being A Mean Girl is SO Last Year

So, I am not going to lie, it's 5:39pm and my deadline is 7pm TODAY and clearly I have been putting this one off because... well...camp. I usually plan ahead what I am going to write about because you know, after all- special people such as you are taking time out of your busy life to read what I have to say so I at least owe you that to plan what I am going to share.  But, today again (because we aren't lying to one another) I had no idea what I was going to write about until I opened up my blank document and the thoughts started to flow.  Granted, two hours and twenty minutes before kickoff of preseason game #2 and an hour before my house was filled with all of the lovely ladies that I am lucky enough to do this crazy world of football with.  And that is when it hit me; I am going to write about the power of community and why it is so last year to be mean, judgmental, and quite frankly appear “too good” for the other women that are living this NFL life WITH us.

Ok, I am going to put this out there: there is hands down NOTHING more intimidating than the first day you roll up to your significant others training camp and look around at all of the insanely gorgeous women. If you are anything like me; my first day coming to Rico’s camp three years ago, I truly started to wonder how the heck I was going to make friends, let alone fit in. There are so many stereotypes of what a “WAG” is supposed to be; how we are supposed to act, dress, look, etc and prior to getting to know anyone- I believed what I had heard.  I believed that everyone would be stuck up, I believed that everyone would have more money than they knew what to do with it, I believed that this industry could quite frankly have the potential to change me for the worse and I was scared.

Obviously, I was SO wrong. I have met some of the most amazing women and I truly don't know where I would be in this crazy world without them. Rico and I have been fortunate enough to be with the Falcons for three years so I would say that I now am one of the women who could potentially be intimidating to someone new to the game.  Having said that, I promised myself three years ago that if we were lucky enough to be here for a length of time, I would do my absolute best to make others feel welcome- in whatever way that I could.

All I can say is this; take the chance and reach out, introduce yourself to somebody new or invite everyone over for pizza and wine to watch the game when the guys play out of town.  You don't have to become "besties", but the truth is that we can all use someone to do football season with and being a mean girl is so last year.

Welcome to the NFL! Making all WAGS feel welcome takes a conscious effort

We all remember the crazy year our NFL lives began. Whether your man went drafted or undrafted, things happen rather quickly.  Our innocent, bright-eyed dreams could never conjure up the things to come. My journey began in Dallas while my now-husband teetered from practice squad to the 53-man roster. Coming from small-town Midwest, it was definitely a culture shock when I showed up to my first game in jeans and a tee. I stood among lavishly-dressed women with their beautiful selves and perfect hair. I obviously didn't fit in. I stuck out so badly that when I waited for Andre after games, security would ask me if I needed help! I must have looked like some jersey-chasing weirdo waiting an hour after each game to catch a glimpse of a player, haha. That's how cool I am, guys. But not only did I stick out, I did not meet one wife in the entire two years with the Cowboys. How sad to think of all the women falling through the cracks on every team?

We all come from different backgrounds and see the world in our own way. We have different morals and don't always agree on things; but we all have one, big interest in common! The best way I've heard it described was at our annual Raiders Women's Association Luncheon. The speaker said something along these lines: "No one knows the struggles you encounter like the person sitting next to you; not your mother, sister, or best friend but definitely the woman in the seat next to you." Nothing could be more true! We can describe our struggles and victories until we're blue in the face to our family or friends but not one of them can fully understand like another WAG.

Our community just welcomed roughly 200+ women, following the draft this past weekend. I want to reach out to every woman associated with a player and remind you what it feels like to step into new territory. Remember all the different emotions that emerged after being uprooted from your comfort zone. Remember the frenzy of moving and not knowing what pediatrician or dentist to use. But smile when you think of that first connection you made with a fellow WAG; the first time you were invited out to eat or the mom group that began your great friendships.

Photo Credits: @kellypray, @asia1012, @butseriously21

NFL Player Engagement Programs Focus on Life Beyond the NFL

Playing in the NFL is a dream for many but only attained by few. It is a small fraternity of men and their families that are connected forever. The NFL launched the NFL Families initiative that not only focused on active players but former players as well, and how they defined FAMILY. It’s more than adorable Dad-Do commercials and invigorating ads, the NFL Family initiative is bridging that gap between the images of fantasy players to seeing players as real people too! Part of this initiative includes the NFL Player Engagement (NFLPE) which focuses on three themes: Prep, Life, and Next.

NFL Prep is for high school and college student-athletes of all sports, and provides them with tools to help them succeed in life, focused on awareness, prevention, and education. NFL Life provides active NFL players with professional and personal development resources, “while supporting and educating players’ families to take full advantage of the opportunities afforded to them by their NFL experience.” NFL Next Legends “serve, equip, and empower former players and their families during the transition from their NFL experience and throughout their lives.” See www.nflplayerengagement.com for more information.

Many players have taken advantage of the various resources available through the NFL Player Engagement. However, there are some players who are completely unaware of the benefits of these resources during their career and in planning for their post-NFL career. From coaching boot camps to personal finance workshops, the Player Engagement programs prove to be worth it. Some programs are even open to spouses. See below for some of the programs scheduled for this year:

NFL BOOT CAMP PERSONAL FINANCE: April 4th-April 7th, 2016

This program will take place in Fort Lauderdale, Florida offering a relaxed learning environment for current and former players and their significant others. This year’s program will provide participants the opportunity to acquire knowledge that directly relates to their finances and lifestyles. Education will be provided by TD Ameritrade and the University of Miami’s School of Business Administration.

NFL BOOT CAMP SPORTS JOURNALISM & RADIO: April 14th-17th, 2016

Sports Journalism and Radio Boot Camp will take place at Bowling Green State University. This boot camp provides the opportunity for current and former players to enhance their writing skills, build journalism and radio portfolios, and receive on-site feedback and mentoring from ESPN Radio, Westwood One, and Bowling Green faculty. Following the completion of this boot camp, qualified candidates may have the opportunity to participate on ESPN Radio.

NFL BOOT CAMP ADVANCED BROADCASTING: May 16th - 19th, 2016

The NFL Advanced Broadcast Boot Camp takes place in Mt. Laurel, NJ at NFL Films and is open to those who have completed Broadcasting Boot Camp. This provides the opportunity to build on the foundation from previous training and strengthen broadcasting skills. This program provides increased knowledge and follow through with more possible job opportunities and internships.

NFL BOOT CAMP BROADCASTING: May 16th-19th, 2016

This year Player Engagement celebrates the 10th annual Broadcasting Boot Camp. Broadcasting Boot Camp provides players on-set training in broadcasting to build experience and determine interests. Players can explore multiple on-air job functions in television/media. Key learnings include: Tape study, show preparation, field reporting, and production meetings.

Bill Walsh NFL Minority Coaching Fellowship

Providing talented minority coaches an opportunity to observe and participate during NFL OTA’s, mini and training camp and assist them in gaining experience to pursue a full-time NFL coaching position.

Resources

MyGoalline.com

In this site, you will find information about your benefits as an NFL player. These benefits protect you while you play, help ease the transition to life and work after football, and provide a base upon which to build for your retirement. We believe that, overall, these benefits are the best available in professional sports. https://www.mygoalline.com/

All Pro Dads

Our message will inspire you to embrace who you are, give you tenderness of heart, and boldness of character as a dad and husband. We are consistently here for you to provide guidance and practical tips in raising your kids in a life giving way.  http://www.allprodad.com/

NFL Foundation

The NFL Foundation is the league’s nonprofit organization representing the 32 NFL clubs. Its mission is to support the health, safety and wellness of athletes, youth football and the communities which support our game. http://www.nflfoundation.org/

Professional Football Wives Association

The Professional Football Wives Association (PFWA) was founded on a mission comprised of three basic tenets: Faith, Family and Football. PFWA's mission is to be a faith based organization that promotes unity and friendship among football wives, fiancées, and girlfriends, that positively redefines the stereotypes of NFL families, and that serves as a support system for women of the NFL. http://www.profootballwives.org

Don’t see a program you like? Contact the NFL Player Engagement office at www.nflplayerengagement.com for more information.

“Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.” - Benjamin Franklin

For more information email me at: [email protected]!

Tenisha Patterson Brown, Esq.

Forever Fierce, Fabulous & Flawless

Facebook: Tenisha Patterson Brown

Instagram: @TPattBrown

Twitter: @TPatt12

SnapChat: TPattBrown

Showing Gratitude For My Life Through Community Service

  When the Tennessee Titans drafted my fiancé Coty Sensabaugh in 2012, I quickly moved from Clemson, South Carolina and relocated to Nashville, Tennessee. Needless to say, moving to a city with no friends, no family and no support system was very difficult. Not to mention the stress of the job search and desire to build my career while discovering my own identity. I was a young, ambitious college graduate, who during interviews with recruiters and potential employers, hid my reasons for relocating to Nashville because of the backlash and perplexed notions they expressed as to why I, a spouse of an NFL player, wanted to work.

I was depressed. However, my resilient spirit and creative nature lead me to doing the thing I loved the most: volunteering. Throughout my high school and college careers, I was always active within my community planning and hosting philanthropic events. Ironically, one of my childhood wishes was “Lord allow me to help those in need,” and almost 20 years later God has truly answered my prayer.

At first, I hid behind my fiancé's identity and organized his charity events. However, last year during the holiday season as I approached my monumental 25th birthday, I wanted to celebrate in a unique and meaningful way, so I launched the “Happy Birthday Dominique” community service project, #25Wishesfor25Years. This was my method of uplifting the many non-profit organizations and outreach agencies empowering my community. This project granted me the opportunity to show extreme gratitude for my life through community service.

My fiancé used his influence and financial resources to ensure the success of this initiative. For 25 consecutive days leading up to my 25th birthday, we hosted a series of events designed to positively impact individuals with a broad spectrum of needs. We fed over 250 impoverished families a Thanksgiving meal, we hosted a series of holiday hope dinners for the Nashville homeless community, we provided gifts for women who were victims of human trafficking, and we hosted a winter wonderland carnival for a local children’s hospital. After each event, we were overwhelmed with humility and thankfulness that God had blessed us with such an awesome opportunity to serve.

Needless to say, I am continuing the Happy Birthday Dominique community service project because this initiative reconnected me with my purpose in life. It also adds excitement to aging because each year that I grow older, Coty and I are able to increase the number of organizations and individuals we positively impact in our community.

This holiday season, I encourage you to find someone or something to give back to. Contact your church, a local or national non-profit, a community outreach agency and find opportunities to serve those in need. Providing your time, monetary resources, or emotional support to these who need you will provide unspeakable joy.